Disappointed.

Today ms wong said she's going to call those people who failed 3 or more subjects. And guess what I'm one of them too. Ever since she said that I've been thinking about it over and over again. I can't stop thinking. What will mum's reaction be like? I can't stop thinking about how disappointed she will feel. I hate that disappointed feeling. What will she say to me then? Idk.
I remember this happened once last year, when I brought back all my results and it was really badly done. I remember how much tears I dropped then. I told myself I will work hard and pass all my subjects so mum won't be disappointed with me ever again but it happened again. Idk how am I going to face mum. I know she will ask me if I need tuition anot and ask me what really happen but idk how to explain even me myself idk what can I do to help myself.
Have I not work hard enough? Idk. Maybe I really didn't. Or maybe I prioritise it wrongly. I shouldn't spend so much time on maths. Maybe I should practise more sciences. MYE. What am i going to do? Will I do this badly again? I guess I need to use this chance to prove to mum that I can do it. I have to and I must do it.
And thanks to everyone who tried to cheer me up esp Gillian and charm who tried saying jokes in class just to see me smile again. But I'm sorry. I really couldn't give a smile just now. How to smile when things are like that. And also Joyce Peijun and Huishi and nut. How to go melizo when things are like that. I don't deserve to go.
Don't give up huiwen. Jiayou!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

well.. yesterday was the last day of school. no one expected it to come so fast. and definitely, no one wants to leave 02! two years of bonding has brought us together, it has broke the wall inside many of us, and everyone got closer. i myself, doesnt want to leave 02! for there is many many awesome people. the one that we share secrets with, the one that were there for us when we were down, and even the one that we spend the most time with. everyone is going to be in different class. for some lucky people, they will have people that they know to be in the same class as them. despite different, i know our bond will still be there. and that nothing can replace 202. everyone split to get better prepared in life for their future. i just hope all the best for everyone in 02 and do their very best next year, despite whatever stream :D ytd was a unlucky day! most of us were down with sore throats. and i was one of them. and worse come to the worse, my condition worsen at night. and my specs ...
Read more
today was an awesome day! :) bbq with 306, the first class outing, although there were some who cant make it. dont worry there will always be another time :) meet gillian, geraldine and regine at 3 to go ntuc to buy all the other stuffs. claire huixin tosy julia zaiqin evelyn all came to meet us cause they were at pepper lunch :) and we just took everything we wanted and dump into the trolley, fun shopping (Y) went to the cashier and make payment and the total cost was like $53.95. i didnt expect it to be so much hahaha but luckily i got enough money if not very.... we took exactly 30 min and we reached the interchange. weisheng and seetha was there, so we waited for timothy :) bbq house called and i told him we will be there at 4.30 so some of us took the earlier bus. reached there, collect the super heavy food and we played some games! :) started the fire at 5.30pm and everyone get ready the stuff at 6 :) some stayed at the pit some went cycling and some went to save a kitten. time p...
Read more

Another new chapter begins.

15 August 2016, the day I lost something that was important to me at that point of time. To be very honest, even though an end to a relationship was common and I told people that we can't be 100% confirm that he will be the one because shit just happens sometimes, I didn't expect shit to happen to me. I really thought I found the partner whom I'm going to spend my life with. This may sound naive, clinche, funny or contradicting, but I really thought that way.  Definitely, I was heartbroken. I was upset. I cried. I talked to myself. Keep telling myself that if it's not meant to be it, then so be it. Keep telling myself that ending everything now is better than ending it in the future when there are more responsibilities. I'm glad that my mind was clear, positive and logical, even though my heart wasn't too well.  I'm thankful to all the people who has comforted me. I know that I still have many family and friends who love me alot. My kids were my happy pills ...
Read more